Bittersweet

There are 77 days until my son turns 2. I don't know how, but somehow the 2nd birthday is going to be even more bittersweet than the first.

From the moment a woman becomes pregnant, everyone she encounters tells her the same thing "enjoy your little baby while it lasts, they grow up so fast" (I also had people tell me that I was "As big as a house" that was fun). And while it got a little annoying hearing the same thing over and over again, the moment I held my baby in my arms, I knew exactly what everyone meant. I wanted to freeze everything. I wanted to stay in that bed and hold my sweet little baby, forever. I can remember crying at night as he lay in my arms at the thought of him growing up. I thought to myself that life couldn't get any better than this very moment in time. But just like everyone had warned me, he continued to grow and grow. Days old, turned into weeks old. Weeks old turned into months and before I knew it was his first birthday. But to my surprise, everyday was better than the last. Watching him grow and learn was the most incredible thing I had ever witnessed. For the last 653 days I have watched  minute by minute as my sweet little baby has turned into a busy, walking, talking toddler. I wouldn't trade a second of any of it, for anything in this world.

God knew exactly what he was doing when he made babies. He knew that as mothers we would never want our babies to grow up, so in turn, he made sure that we would enjoy the ride every step of the way. He made sure that while we were tearfully packing up all those little baby clothes, we would still have plenty to look forward to. He made sure that we would have plenty of unforgettable moments, like these...

That first glimmer of a perfect little smile

The most amazing sound. A baby laughing.

The first swim class

Silly faces that make us laugh til we cry.

The moment when they can almost walk by themselves.

Cupcake picnics in the park.

The unforgettable first birthday.

More silly faces, to cherish forever.

Toys. Everywhere.

First hockey game. Favorite character: Walt

Innocent moments where they don't know that you are watching them.

The first haircut (yes, I cried. I loved those curls).

The first real Easter egg hunt

The first game of soccer

I know with my son, I have so much to look forward to. His first full sentence, the first time he ties his shoes, our first real conversation together, the day he becomes a big brother or the day he takes off on his bike without training wheels. And someday (many years from now) I will look forward to the day when he finds a career that makes him happy, meets the woman of his dreams, the day when I get to sit in the front row at his wedding and someday I will look forward to the moment when he gets to hold his child in his arms for the first time, and then maybe he will know for a split second just how much I love him.

Of course, I will always miss him being a little baby, and in my heart when I look at him, a part of me will always see him as my tiny little sweet baby.

This baby.

And for the rest of my life if I ever look at his newborn photos, there will always be tears. I will miss the diapers, late night feedings,  and cute little pajamas. And I will alway yearn for those close body, late night cuddles for the rest of my life. But, I know I have so much more to look forward to. As mothers we will always miss our little babies and I think a part of us will always have baby fever, but it's imortant to enjoy the ride along the way. Because baby, it's an amazing ride.






***I wanted to give a shout to my friend Mery over at  http://merysunshine.com/. Without her this blog post would not have been possible. I follow 3 blogs on a regular basis, and one of them is hers. I hope you all will take a little stroll over there, I promise the moment you start reading you will feel a rush of strength, courage and of course-sunshine. Enjoy!